Hanging with Bernard Madoff (it wasn't memorable)
I spent some time with alleged mega-scammer Bernard Madoff last fall. And ever since I got the WSJ news alert e-mail Thursday afternoon about his arrest, I've been thinking I should write something about my experiences. My problem has been that I can barely remember them. Madoff was kind of a cipher: Nice enough guy, seemed reasonably smart, said absolutely nothing of interest.
The reason we met was that I was moderating a panel discussion on "The Future of the Stock Market" at the Philoctetes Center for the Multidisciplinary Study of Imagination on the Upper East Side of Manhattan. Madoff was a friend of one of the guys who runs Philoctetes, and he had helped put together the panel. He called me up a few weeks before the event and asked me to come over to discuss what we should talk about. So I walked to the Lipstick Building on Third Ave., took the elevator up to his office, and we chatted for about half an hour. I don't remember a word of the conversation. Then he gave me a tour of his firm's sleek and sparsely populated trading floor, and told me a little about how his market making business had evolved. I don't remember any mention of the asset management arm that has caused all the trouble.
Then we did the panel discussion. I remember Josh Stampfli, who ran Madoff's automated market-making group, saying some really interesting things about the rationality of markets or the lack thereof. But I don't remember a word Madoff said. And while Philoctetes videotaped the whole event and had it transcribed, it has now removed all that incriminating evidence from its Website (and from YouTube). I might start to wonder if Bernard Madoff actually existed, but I think a lot of suddenly poorer rich people out there will be able to attest to the fact that he did.
Update The video is back up. Philoctetes had taken it down because people were leaving nasty comments, not because there was anything incriminating in it (other than perhaps my remark that Madoff Securities was "one of those really important financial institutions that doesn't show up in headlines"). But they decided it seemed weird not to make the video available, so now all the world can see it again. All 127 minutes and 36 glorious seconds of it.
Update 2 I'm watching it now. Madoff's description of the early days of his firm and of Nasdaq (it starts around minute 10) is pretty interesting. Nothing about Ponzi schemes, though.
Update 3 Incriminating evidence! It's around 111:50 on the tape (I just randomly skipped ahead to it):
I'm very close with the regulators, so I'm not trying to say what they do is bad. As a matter of fact, my niece just married one.
Update 4 CNBC has discovered the video.
Update 5 I've now posted an abridged video of the event.
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1
Seems one of our "tribe," maybe even a chief, left the reservation. Hope some cowboys get him.
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2
Hey, I am sure your niece made a smart choice (because your are so smart yourself, and she should be smarter than you); congratulations to her.
The reason why you hardly remember Madoff is that nobody notices psychopaths. -
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4
Dear President Obama,
It is time to dismantle the SEC and start all over. The geniuses that nailed Martha Stewart let this guy operate under everyone's noses for decades.
Sincerely yours,
WilliamBanzai7
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5
HEDGE FUND'S ROASTING ON AN OPEN FIRE
(The Christmas Song)
WilliamBanzai7Hedgefunds roasting on an open fire
Investors sure to get the hose
Alpha carols being sung by a wealthy choir of the dumb
And regulators dressed up like EskimosEverybody knows the hedge hog turkeys and
Madoff's ponzi scheme help to make the seasons blight
SEC examiners with their eyes all aglow
Will find it hard to sleep tonightThey know that billions of losses are on the way
The markets are loaded with cash cows for slaughter
Its the Wall Street way
And ev'ry wealthy grandmother's
Child is gonna spy to see if
Quants, traders and pinstriped conmen really know how to flyAnd so, I'm offering this
Simple phrase to investors from
One to ninety-two
Altho' it's been said many times
Many ways
Merry Redemptions to you -
6
Dope dealing is called criminal? You get something for your money, what did his people get? Screwed is the polite word. Cut his nuts off without any, "I won't feel the pain drugs!!!" Ho to the 10th degree.
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7
MADOFF THE WALL STREET FAKIR
(Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer)
WilliamBanzai7You know Vesco and Boesky, and Keating and Milken,
Leeson and Mozer, and Ponzi and Wiggen,
But do you recall, the most famous securities fraudster of all?Madoff the WALL STREET FAKIR
Had a GIANT PONZI SCHEME,
And if you ever saw it,
You could say it was Wall Street's own worst dream.All of the other Wall Street fraudsters
Used to laugh and call him names;
They never believed poor Madoff
Made a legitimate Alpha trade,Then one shady Wall Street trading eve,
Madoff spilt his own beans to the SEC
"Madoff oh your scheme's so bright,
Won't you go to jail tonight?"Then how the Wall Street fraudsters loved him
As they shouted out with glee,
"Madoff the WALL STREET FAKIR,
You'll go down in securities fraud infamy."Q: Whats the difference between Bernie Madoff and the CEO of a bulge bracket Wall Street investment bank?
A: Madoff is not asking for a bailout.
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8
Yet another financial scandal of epic proportion.
Broker Madoff appears to have burnt away 50 billion dollars after the huge pyramid scheme evaporated, dragging banks and financial institutions across several nations in Europe.
This piercing news came less than a week after Wall Street's revelation of a grand lie that cost tens of billions. What has the financial world gone to? With such dirty duplicity and insatiable greed perpetrating all over the globe, will there be any hope of a quick or healthy recovery from the current crisis? Fat hope.
Be prepared for more such terribly indecent shocks.
(Tan Boon Tee) -
9
Justin, you should have asked Madoff to do his disappearing quarter trick. That's how you get him started.
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10
He sure ruined Christmas for a lot of Jews...
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11
Indeed. No seconds at the Chinese restaurant this year!
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